How to Stop Questioning Yourself


Why is it that we are always questioning ourselves and our abilities? And not just in one area either. As busy wives and mothers we tend to run in so many different directions. I don’t know about you, but there are times when I am wondering about my choices in every area at the same time. Here are some examples of the questions I struggle with:


  • Family – Am I being supportive and loving to my husband and children? Do I spend enough time with them? Am I disciplining enough? Too much?
  • Homeschool – Am I doing the right thing, keeping my children home? Am I being selfish? Are we using the right curriculum? Are my expectations too high? Too low?
  • Faith – Am I spending enough time with God each day? Is it okay to focus on this specific topic? I should be praying more. Which devotions are best for the children? What do I know? What do I need to know? How should I defend my faith to others?
  • Meal planning/Diets- Fat-free? Gluten-free? Sugar-free? Affordable? Restrictive? Permissive? Holy cow, this topic is scary!!!
  • Ministry- Is this where I belong? Am I serving enough? When should I say yes? Is it okay to say no?
  • Working – Should I work? Should I stay home with the kids? Is it okay to work part-time?

Of course, these are only a few examples. Maybe your list is longer. Some of these questions may be valid. At times, it can be important to re-evaluate our situations. On the other hand, sometimes we question ourselves because we have access to too much information about what others are doing. We constantly compare ourselves even though our circumstances may be entirely different.  I’m learning to do that less often. I am also learning to be more confident in my choices, by letting God guide me in my decision-making. Here are some strategies I use.

Be calm.  Just breathe. Some of these things will work themselves out on their own, in their own time.

Wait. If I wait patiently instead of trying to analyze and figure everything out on my own, it’s possible that I will just know what to do.

Trust God. He has given me the gifts and talents He knows I need to fulfill His purpose in my life. I can be confident in my choices and abilities when I recognize these things.

Turn off some of the outside influences. Honestly, I get so overwhelmed by the sheer amount of information that is available just by pressing a few buttons on my laptop. Often, I am so bogged down by blogs, books, sermons, podcasts, etc., that I wouldn’t be able to hear Him if he was shouting in my ear.

Listen. How many times have I asked God questions but haven’t taken the time to listen to his answers? Right now, I am practicing just a few minutes of silence a day. And it is hard! But I am expecting that God will speak to me in these very special times.

Spend time in the Word. If we are focused on the Truth, we can more easily block out the voices that try to tell us we aren’t good enough.

“Trust in the Lord with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding. In all your ways, acknowledge Him and He will direct your path.”

Proverbs 3: 5-6

Are you constantly questioning? What is the toughest area for you? I would love to hear ways you have found to be more confident.

1 thought on “How to Stop Questioning Yourself

  1. Sometimes I feel like I need a big flashing sign that says THIS WAY! It’s hard to make decisions especially without a life partner to bounce ideas off of. I’m going to start having quiet time; listening time each day… Great idea.

Leave a Comment